Reasons why God shouldn't want me to be a Pastor

I think about this a lot. Especially since I decided to pursue being ordained.

I have always believed that I am supposed to be an ordained servant of God from my earliest memories.  As I grew up and life happened, I began to believe that there was no way that God would ever want me.  

I've been through a lot and to make a long story short, even though I am beyond damaged I made the choice to go to school, get an undergraduate degree and then go to seminary.  since I made that decision and acted on it, things for the most part are going right for me; in my spiritual life at least  I attended an Evangelical University for the last 3 years and it really challenged me to look at what Scripture says and what I believe.  

1. I believe in the teachings of Jesus Christ and in Scripture

2. I believe that Christ was connected to God in a way that we still don't understand

3. I believe in the Holy Spirit and that she is a feminine force

4. I believe in God as the Creator of all things

5. I believe that the Earth is billions of years old

6.  I believe that the Big Bang theory and the Theory of Evolution are currently the best scientific theories out there, though I believe they both have holes and in those holes I usually find God

7.  I believe in a scientific Adam and Eve.  I believe that scripture is the result of a very early understanding of an ultimate truth, that we call come from one man and one woman whom God made different.

8.  I believe that all religion is cultural reaction to the presence of God.  Religion is a human reaction to Divinity.  No religion has is right from what I've seen, especially those who still kill or ostracize in the name of their God. My God loves everyone according to scripture, regardless of where they live and how they understand who God is.  God knows that we still don't "get it" but God loves and forgives us anyway.

9.  I believe the commonality between all major religion is where we come closest to seeing who God really is.  

10.  I believe in reincarnation.  I know it's not supported in the Bible but I have my reasons and I do not believe it goes against scripture but simply isn't mentioned.   

11.  I believe that one can be a science nerd and a Christian.  One is not mutually exclusive of the other. 

12.  I believe that there has always been a war in Christianity between those who believe that Christ taught us that first we need to find the Kingdom within ourselves which will then manifest the Kingdom here and now versus those who think that we work towards a reward after we die in Heaven.  Scripture clearly says that the Kingdom of Heaven will come here on Earth.

This is hardly a full list of my beliefs and I have no doubt that as I study things may change and/or evolve as I learn and reflect and listen to God.  However, since I embarked on the path to give my life to the service of God I have only had success.  this leads me to believe that God, even though these are some of my beliefs, still wishes this of me.  I might not understand why, but I know I'm on the right path.

peace,
Nirr  

mandatory creationism

OK as I think I've mentioned I'm attending a University which was founded by a major Evangelist.  Until now I've really only had good things to say about most of the classes.  Every time I was sure that I was going to have to put up my dukes in a class, I was greatly surprised by the lack of bias.  There have been a few minor instances but overall I've had a positive experience and believe God led me there for more than the cheap tuition and the valid credits.  That said....

I'm now changing schools because I do not want to be associated with a college that makes in mandatory that all students take a class called The Origins of Life.  It is not a science class, though it's almost presented that way.  It's not a philosophy class nor could it be called a theology class.  I honestly felt as if I was sitting in a brainwashing class.

There were diagrams of the Ark with dinosaurs walking onto it next to humans and animals.  I was told that the belief in the Theory of Evolution was, logically, the root of racism.  I was told that the earth is less than 7,000 years old.  And this is all in just the first two weeks.

Now, I'm a science nerd and a Christian.  I don't know when it was decided that one was the polar opposite of the other.  Why can't I believe in God and believe that even now when we feel so technologically advanced, we really know very little.  I believe in the Big Bang Theory.  I'm no physicist but I've read enough and asked enough to understand the basic theory and the fact is that we have proof of the Big Bang but when we trace it back we hit a wall we cannot see beyond. For some scientists, that is just another challenge.  For me?  That is God.  Maybe someday we will see back beyond that point somehow.  However, Scripture tells me that there was nothing before that point but God.  I believe that.

I believe in scripture but I do not believe that it was intended to be a history or science text book!  And I think to try to make it that is to completely miss the point.  I believe God speaks to us through Holy Scripture and through our advances in Science.  I believe there are deep universal truths about who we are and where we come from that can be found in both.  I do not believe that either has all of the answers.

I hope to never be a member of the kind of Christianity that sticks its head in the sand and ignores scientific knowledge because it doesn't mesh with our current understanding of scripture.  God does not want us to live in the 1st century understanding of what God is or who we are in relation to the universe that was created for us.

peace.