Reasons why God shouldn't want me to be a Pastor

I think about this a lot. Especially since I decided to pursue being ordained.

I have always believed that I am supposed to be an ordained servant of God from my earliest memories.  As I grew up and life happened, I began to believe that there was no way that God would ever want me.  

I've been through a lot and to make a long story short, even though I am beyond damaged I made the choice to go to school, get an undergraduate degree and then go to seminary.  since I made that decision and acted on it, things for the most part are going right for me; in my spiritual life at least  I attended an Evangelical University for the last 3 years and it really challenged me to look at what Scripture says and what I believe.  

1. I believe in the teachings of Jesus Christ and in Scripture

2. I believe that Christ was connected to God in a way that we still don't understand

3. I believe in the Holy Spirit and that she is a feminine force

4. I believe in God as the Creator of all things

5. I believe that the Earth is billions of years old

6.  I believe that the Big Bang theory and the Theory of Evolution are currently the best scientific theories out there, though I believe they both have holes and in those holes I usually find God

7.  I believe in a scientific Adam and Eve.  I believe that scripture is the result of a very early understanding of an ultimate truth, that we call come from one man and one woman whom God made different.

8.  I believe that all religion is cultural reaction to the presence of God.  Religion is a human reaction to Divinity.  No religion has is right from what I've seen, especially those who still kill or ostracize in the name of their God. My God loves everyone according to scripture, regardless of where they live and how they understand who God is.  God knows that we still don't "get it" but God loves and forgives us anyway.

9.  I believe the commonality between all major religion is where we come closest to seeing who God really is.  

10.  I believe in reincarnation.  I know it's not supported in the Bible but I have my reasons and I do not believe it goes against scripture but simply isn't mentioned.   

11.  I believe that one can be a science nerd and a Christian.  One is not mutually exclusive of the other. 

12.  I believe that there has always been a war in Christianity between those who believe that Christ taught us that first we need to find the Kingdom within ourselves which will then manifest the Kingdom here and now versus those who think that we work towards a reward after we die in Heaven.  Scripture clearly says that the Kingdom of Heaven will come here on Earth.

This is hardly a full list of my beliefs and I have no doubt that as I study things may change and/or evolve as I learn and reflect and listen to God.  However, since I embarked on the path to give my life to the service of God I have only had success.  this leads me to believe that God, even though these are some of my beliefs, still wishes this of me.  I might not understand why, but I know I'm on the right path.

peace,
Nirr